Notes on Being a Man – Part II: Two Words

This guest post was authored by Chris Gucciardo.
Welcome back, everyone. There are two words I would like to share with you today: “discipline” and “responsibility.”

Discipline is the ability one has to that allows her or him to not judge a person based on gender or sexual orientation. Moreover, just because a gay male does not follow the guidelines of being a “man” society has defined for us so obviously does not mean he isn’t a gay man. Likewise, just because men are naturally stronger than women, one should have the discipline to treat a woman humanely, honestly, and not as a sexual object or something to abuse their power on. Discipline builds awareness and allows one to procure the fundamental ideals of what a real man should and should not be and do.

Responsibility is what a real man has and works with to redefine society’s idea of masculinity and what it means to be a man. We need young boys, young men and teenagers, and adult men to take responsibility and create a society where feminism is not a radical group, but instead a mix of all people who simply fight for equality in women’s rights. We need men of all ages to take the initiative to create a society where one’s masculinity is not threatened because they love another man. Additionally, one should be able to live with the security to be openly gay, and accepted by heterosexual men as a man as well.

Of course there are aspects of society’s “man” that are healthy and ideal such as staying fit and physically healthy, getting a well-paying, rewarding occupation, and supporting his family. Yet in the two posts I’ve written for MasculinityU, I pointed out only some of the negative aspects society idealizes in its definitions of “masculinity” and “man.” Men, carry with you always the discipline to realize what is wrong and the responsibility to make it right.

I appreciate this outlet, and having the opportunity to share my thoughts and beliefs with others. It makes me feel proud and encouraged to support the movement toward a world free of gender and sexual violence, a world where men, women, and all members of the LGBTQI community can have equal rights and live in peace and security.


Chris Gucciardo is a student at at The State University of New York College of Environmental Science and Forestry. He is an Executive board member A Men’s Issue, a group at Syracuse University.

One thought on “Notes on Being a Man – Part II: Two Words

  1. I am very glad to see that this topic is being acknowledged. The issue, I believe, is really developing from this idea that masculinity, a social construct in itself, is equated with being nongendered and therefore the norm. This idea complicates relations between genders, including those that diverge from ‘normalcy’ (heterosexuality), as others are subjected to becoming second-rate citizens. In this sense men are compelled to uphold their status by limiting themselves to certain behaviors because to not conform to the generalized ‘rules of manhood’ would put at risk their roles within their social groups. I would stress that masculinity should only hold as much weight as its wearer gives it and to let it not be a definitive model for all men.

    Justin

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